Insecurity is a sad, sad thing and this Actor's Wife has long believed that it is the root of all meanness. I saw a very sad and disturbing thing happen today and it was motivated by insecurity. Deep and ugly insecurity. One talented person did a lot of work for a newcomer and did his best to help raise the newcomer to a higher level. This talented person wasn't protective of his "turf" and he felt rewarded when he saw the newcomer succeeding. But the newcomer, so pathetic in his self-doubting, when he had the chance to return a favor for the talented person chose instead to tear him down, begrudge him any success.
The newcomer is in the grips of the lip-curling resentment because he has pissed around his territory and the talented person dares to draw near. The newcomer simply would not be where he is today without the help of the talented person and yet shows no gratitude. What it boils down to is that the newcomer is afraid that the talented person (who is certainly more talented and experienced in the first place) would show him up, would steal his thunder. And the hard truth is that the newcomer is right. If he ever allowed them both to stand under the same spotlight, the talented person would shine so much brighter.
And that ugly story leads me to my philosophical pondering for today. Let's just go straight to the man who understood balance and acceptance better than any other, my oft-quoted friend Lao Tzu.
Therefore the sage produces without possessing,
Acts without expectations
And accomplishes without abiding in her accomplishments.
It is precisely because she does not abide in them
That they never leave her.
The wise man produces without possessing because he understands that things rise of their own volition. You do not own your success any more than you own your fame. You are not the one who brings things about. If God chooses to turn his face upon you, who are you to claim the credit for yourself? And if God chooses to turn his face upon someone else, how dare you begrudge him that blessing?
I'm steadfastly convinced of the efficacy of sowing and reaping, what goes around comes around, karma. The Universe does not like a person who covets their success, who keeps their hands closed, who guards their mini kingdom like a watchdog. Be generous. Be happy for another's success. Be proud to be associated with a person who is on the rise, even if that person cannot be you. To everything there is a season and everyone gets a turn at glory. If you begrudge others their moment in the sun, you will always stand in the shade.
Pride does not wish to owe and vanity does not wish to pay. ~François de la Rochefoucauld
The envious die not once, but as oft as the envied win applause. ~Baltasar Gracian
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